Forums IMPORTANT: PLEASE READ Abundance for Life, Effortless Success Congruent Communication in action

This January I bought the Abundance for Life. I finished it, gave myself some time to assimilate it better and now I decided to repeat it with deeper understanding. I am especially interested in the Congruent Communication...The bigger my internal alignment with my choice to manifest, the bigger my influence on other people – that really impressed me most...

So now I have a chance to practise this and see how it works.
My situation is as follows: now I am selling my appartment and I understand how important it is to be internally congruent, to greet the potential buyers with gratitude..and the next step is to ask what do the people coming to see the appartment want? I don`t know in my case is it appropriate to ask this question – I am not an agency to offer them a variety of flats by asking them what they want?

So my question is: How do I proceed with applying the Congruent Communication, while selling my flat?
Shall I ask questions ( usually the buyers are those to ask about the property and I am supposed to answer them) and if so what kind of questions?

I really hope to get clarity on this...Thank you..

Hello everyone!

several days ago I asked a question about CC...and still have no answer...I still hope that someone may have an answer?

Alex, what about you? Would you help me, please?

Thanks everyone...

I recommend using the Sales Leap Paraliminal.


If you want to be congruent you find out what the customer is looking for. It's simple to ask "what are you looking for in an apartment?" Find out if they are auditory, visual or kinaesthetic. They tell you what they want, price, location, place to relax, space, whatever. Then you can point out the best features and help them ask the questions that they want answered.

Often people don't know what to ask the owner. If you ask what they are looking for in the apartment you can point out the features that match or can be amended to suit their needs. The features they may be looking for might not be already in place.

You can also find that by asking them what they are looking for in an apartment, they start seeing it and describing it themselves.

Remember when you answer their questions, remember their answer to the question about what they said they were looking for and you can frame your answers around that.

Being congruent is a lot about listening to. So don't be afraid to ask questions whether they are planing to expand family if the apartment is not pet friendly it's good to find out if they already have pets.

So enter into conversation with them, get to know them don't be afraid to ask questions.

Alex

This is very insightful! Thank you, Alex.

The point to find if s.o. is auditory, visual etc...is to mimic their body language, isn`t it?

Sometimes I wonder if my communication with this group is congruent?! Alex, you are the onle one to answer my questions...noone ever shared their experience? Why? Are my sharings lacking congruity?

Wishing love and light to everyone, I remain open to any suggestions...:)))

Not necessarily mimic. To use the knowledge to communicate congruently.

If they talk about feeling cozy, snug. It doesn't do to mention how dark the room gets for sleeping or how quiet it is. It's better to point out the fresh air, the warmth, the soft texture of the carpet as appropriate.

Same if they talk in terms of visuals. They are interested in the views, they notice if there is garbage in the stairwell. It's better to point out the clean streamlined kitchen, the earthy colours of the bedroom.

AS for no one sharing, I think it's a case of problem solved they drop off visiting. And others viewing have a similar curiosity and are looking for answers too.

Alex

Good answers, Alex! Thank you...I will use the message in them...

Here comes my next question: If the person is kinaesthehic - does it means that he/she makes a lot of gestures with their hands, face and body which in turn I can follow and express myself in a similar( with more gestures)way?

I know I am delving much in the detailed body language and I want to really become good at it....Thank you Alex for your replies! Have a really joyful day!

The kinaesthetic person will use words like cosy, warm rough, smooth, comfortable. They like to touch things so are more likely to be running their hand over the surface of a counter or wall, may even hold or jiggle a pen or object around in their hand.

Hand to the face, crossing themselves are part of other cues that give you an idea how open or closed a person is. A hand moving towards the face (ear mouth area) can indicate an untruth is about to be disclosed or the person does not want to give something voice. Naturally you'll need to consider that with other indicators like what the mouth and eyes are doing at that moment too.

If a person is very expressive with a lot of gestures, do not imitate them. They will notice. And it's insulting to them because they will pick up on it. And to an onlooker it would look like a badly mimed sword-fight. Watch what the still part of the body does. Is it open or closed and that is the one you can use to gain rapport.

Gaining rapport is usually done subtly. If you're really congruent you'll more likely do it anyway and naturally. As we naturally adjust our posture tone and breathing to someone we connect with. So if you do find yourself connecting with someone who is physically expressive you may find you do a bit more physical expression yourself. However it will be less expressive than the one who uses their arms hands and body to express themselves as part of their natural personality. They may be trying to tone it down and it doesn't allow them to do that if you start leading them to do it more.

In all I don't think you have to try too hard. Just remember when selling, to remember what the customer wants and do your best to help the customer get that. And if you cannot give them exactly what they want let them off easily. Or if you know they want something better, then you help the customer allow themselves to have that.

Alex

Yes, indeed, very helpful...

What especially appeals to me is to be myself - easy and naturally....being attentive to the details and following my spleen( intuition) is the key...
O.k. here we go, so the only thing left now is to wish myself good luck!

Thank you, Alex

Alex, earlier you recommended using the Sales Leap Paraliminal. Could you specify how it should be used : everyday for 7-21-30 days or more until the property is sold? Or listening to it just before each visit of clients/ potential buyers?
Thank you

Just listen the day or so before meeting with buyers. You could listen every other day for a week just for the fun of seeing how it affects your confidence and communication around others.

Alex