Learning Strategies Blog

How to acquire new behaviors

by Pete Bissonette

I mentioned the New Behavior Generator in my last post. It is one of the three Paraliminals I have used the most. The other two are 10-Minute Supercharger and Prosperity, which I’ll write about later this week or next week.

When someone asks which Paraliminal to get, I always say to follow your intuition. Don’t get something because you think you should get it. Get your mind out of your way. Follow your hunch.

But…if you were only to get one Paraliminal ever, it would without a doubt be the New Behavior Generator.

There are two primary ways to use it:

ACQUIRE A BEHAVIOR

You can use it for any type of behavior or internal response: smiling more, playing the piano, applying stucco to a wall, putting on the tee, cooking, not letting your sister push your buttons, feeling happy when you see someone… You merely need to know of someone who already acts or responds in that way.  As you listen to the CD, you’ll pull on that person’s behavior for yourself. It is very cool. I would generally see results right away each time. For some behaviors I’ve had to listen multiple times over a few week period.

ACHIEVE A GOAL

Pick a goal. Let’s say it is to become a better speaker. Then make a list of every behavior you have that keeps you from attaining that goal. Examples could be:  I get nervous when I’m in front of people, I rely too much on my notes, I use ahs and ums, I am monotone, etc.

Then make a list of behaviors that would help you become a better speaker. Perhaps, prepare better, create a great first impression, connect with the audience, get eye contact with the audience, be animated, use humor effectively, etc.

Then listen to the first session of New Behavior Generator, called Reframing, once for each item on the first list and listen to the second session, called Generating, for each item on the second list. You can listen in any order. I’d probably keep it to one or two listening sessions a day. About a month after listening, check your progress toward your goal. You may want to repeat one or more of the sessions. If your goal was to be a better speaker, check your progress after you’ve had a chance to speak.

You can use the New Behavior Generator process on your own without the CD, which is how I first learned it from Paul back in the early 80s. It is a powerful neuro-linguisitc programming (NLP) process, in and of itself. The CD simply makes the process much easier.

1) Know the behavior you would like to acquire. Be in a quiet place where you can sit with your eyes closed. Be relaxed, and take your time.

2) Think of a model—a person who consistently demonstrates the behavior that will help you achieve your goal. Imagine that person in front of you right now, performing the behavior with mastery.

3) Carefully check your feelings to make sure that this is what you want. Ask yourself, If I could have this resource as my own, would I choose it? If your feelings say no, then modify the behavior until it’s just right.

4) Focus on the subtle details of this behavior… the posture involved… the rhythm and tempo of the movements… the quality of the voice… how facial muscles move when your model speaks.

5) Put yourself in place of your model. See yourself doing the exact behavior that your model demonstrated. Feel yourself using the same muscles… the same posture… the same movements… the same voice.

6) As you repeat this visualization several times, completely accept the new behavior. Know that it will serve you in positive ways. This rich resource is already available to you, whenever you want it.

7) Mark your calendar for about a month later so that you can notice your progress.

That’s it! Enjoy generating new behaviors and all of the rewards that come with it. Be sure to check the 20-page booklet that comes with each Paraliminal, because they contain many more useful tips and insights.

Pete