I believe that women can hold in high esteem a man, but not intend to have a romance with him. I have fallen into this trap a few times. So I tend to avoid romance with women just on the basis they have a high opinion of me. Of course, if there is romance, then the high esteem will be there too.

Hi Really

First off, my posts were intended to help you, and I make no apology for any opinions given in the spirit of trying to help another.

As to esteem issues, most people have them! I know I do. You'd have to be way up the scale of self-realisation/enlightenment not to have them.

Secondly, if you had no esteem issues at all, you genuinely wouldn't care that your friend took the action she did, nor would you take exception, in any way, to what I wrote.

I will refrain from participating in this thread now, as you obviously want to hear certain things, and not others.

I wish you the best of luck in resolving your situation, and peace of mind.

IG, I am not asking you to apologize if you were responding in the true spirit of trying to be helpful.I just felt that you were ignoring me when I explained in this particular case, my self worth is not attached.I love myself for who I am.Of course in my life from time to time I have felt low self esteem; and beat myself up at times for my mistakes.I think we all do.My only point was that one can have have a high sense of self and still feel upset when a relationship goes sour.The relationships in my life are quite important to me whether personal or professional.I just thought you were making some assumptions that simply were not true.As I said, I value and respect what you were saying, but don't I have the right to speak to what is accurate in regard to how I feel? I don't think it's mutually exclusive for a person to have high self esteem and yet take exception to something perceived to be an inaccurate remark.That's all I had hoped to do.Please respond as you wish, and I want good will on the forum.I want anyone to respond to me who wishes to.I certainly don't bite; I tickle.
Thanks again, and hopefully no hard feelings?

That's sad. Though I haven't tried it to restore a relationship. Though I had a similar experience. And the exact same words were also sent to me. And it's not a nice feeling. Still trying to overcome it.

UPDATE-------TO ANYONE WHO MAY HAVE FOLLOWED THIS POST FROM THIS PAST SPRING........

I spoke with the person as of Thursday, December 17, 2009 and the situation was resolved.We seem to be on good terms again!

Thanks so much especially to those who remained optimistic.
Happy Holidays!

See the following posts below.The situation was resolved as of 12/17/09.Thanks for trying to help; as you only posted the best answer you knew how to give.

We are all happy this turnout to be like in a fairytale. Good luck for the future.

Not a fairytale;just simple communication and a belief that things could be better than they were left.I am not sure why you would think it was a fairytale; as it took a lot to want to re-connect.

The magic still happened, so there was a shift in energy from both sides.

Okay.I see how you may be using the term "magic." Certainly it took the other person to listen, to be there to even answer the phone.I thought that would have been a given.I was saying that to my way of thinking I had to shift my ontology.Thanks,