So how many people keep telling the same story over, and over, and over, without being able to move on. It’s as if the story defines who they are.
Similarly, many people get stuck in habitual destructive behaviors that they can’t release. They hide behind many fears—of the unknown, of upsetting the status quo, of making a huge mistake, of appearing stupid, of disappointing someone … the list is endless.
A huge shift can occur in these situations when you look at them through eyes that seek the gifts in these events. There is always wisdom to be gleaned from past, challenging circumstances. It can seem as if you are not allowed to move beyond that history until you have acknowledged and internalized the incredible learning that was generated by those circumstances. The resistance to releasing seems as if it might even be a protective gesture that prevents you from not carrying the new wisdom and skills forward.
Once you acknowledge, with gratitude, the incredible growth or realizations generated by a past event, it is easier to release the debris that you no longer need. It can be incredibly freeing and renewing when you take this step.
When habitual non-expansive behaviors ensnare you, it is wise to step back and acknowledge that at some point that behavior made sense and had a purpose. Thinking small may have made you less of a target in a violent household, never speaking up might have kept you safe from a bully at school, obsessive perfectionism may have resulted in the only approval you could get from your parents.
When you look at these behaviors from this perspective, you again are able to go to a place of gratitude for them, acknowledging that they kept you safe or in some way enabled you to perform up to expectations. Once you realize the wisdom that was inherent in this behavior, you can thank it for doing exactly what you needed at that time. You can also acknowledge that you are now a grownup with resources and capabilities far beyond what you had when this habitual behavior served you so well.
An "I now choose ….." statement coming from your present position of resourcefulness and adult options is a great way to hone in on what belief or behavior would now serve you much better. Remember, as well, that you may need to reassure your other-than-conscious mind that you will continue to protect yourself when needed, but you will use your adult discernment to determine what is truly a threat and what is just an illusory fear you need to move through.
These ongoing assessments, made from present moment awareness, will have an incredible impact on the life you live. You will have incorporated the wisdom from past events, but will no longer let the events themselves deter you from living fully in the power that is your birthright!
The "Express Gratitude" exercise in Jack Canfield’s Effortless Success is a great tool for incorporating gratitude into your daily life. It can be used on past events such as those described above, as well as events that are currently happening. There seems to be an interesting correlation between the frequency and regularity with which you express gratitude, and the number of things you have to be grateful for!
Simply make a habit of asking yourself the following questions on a daily basis:
What am I grateful for?
Why am I grateful for it?
How can I express my gratitude?
What specific action can I take to express your gratitude?
When will I do that?
Do this for the next forty days, and notice how incredibly abundant your life is!
Wendy Greer
Success Coach for Effortless Success
I have purchased several of your courses some of them seem to work to an extent. I have been very disappointed with the Effortless Success program with Jack Canfield. I was excited initially because he is so well known I thought that he along with Paul Sheeley would be fabulous because I am very impressed with Paul’s success. But this course was not helpful at all. It was very expensive and Jack seems to spend a lot of time telling his experiences. Honestly, I did not pay so much money to hear about him. I paid it to learn how I can use it to help me.
I realize the course does this also to an extent but it seems to be more geared at Jack Canfield telling us how successful he is. I do not like the question and answer format. I wish this course’s format was more that of a teacher instructing students rather than an interview about Jack’s life.
I know I sound negative and I apologize for that. I do feel frustrated that I cannot seem to get anywhere with this course.
I never would’ve thought at things that way. This is going to make my afternoon a whole lot easier.
There seems to be a common problem here. Money. I am also restricting myself to buy Learning Strategies programs because i do find them to be expensive… I bought the Photo-reading program and i think it was worth it but all else i’m interested in, i’ll just skip. or buy from somewhere else. I hope the prices can be brought down to a more accessible price.
Robert and others,
More and more people are getting together in study groups to do a program together. There are many ways to do this. Some get together once a week for a couple of months, others get together twice a week. One person buys the course, but everyone pitches in, and then they use the course together. They listen to the sessions as a group, discuss them as a group, and everyone makes commitments to what they will do until the next session.
I love our courses, because they are designed so that anyone can use them for their personal benefit without having to travel to a course or consult with a teacher. Study groups can bring that to a higher level while reducing the costs.
How can you get a group together? Talk with your family, friends, colleagues at work, and members of your church or other organizations–even schools. You can also go online. There are many ways for you to meet up with others who share a common interest.
It’s an idea that works.
Pete
Your programs are always worth it. Even when I am in doubt of myself, others will say they notice a difference. It is, however, the price that keeps me from ordering more programs. As much as I’ve used many of your products, it doesn’t seem to help me financially. It helps me focus, feel confident or even explore other areas that I might not, if I wasn’t confident. I wish the self-sabotage aspect was incorporated into all of the programs I’ve already bought from you. I guess I was expecting that, but it wasn’t or didn’t attain that level.
Hi,I,too,remain interested in other programs offered,especially the retreats/workshops during the year…I`d love to be able to attend even one in my lifetime! But,I don`t have the money to allow myself that luxury..I have all of Master Lins` SF QiGong levels…I practiced this over and over to help
my sister heal from an advanced stage of a rare cancer…it worked,with the help of the Creator I firmly believe in and the combined healing energies from the universe…
Unfortunately,I tried using the healing with my father who is now dying…He was in good health until
being sent to a rehab center/nursing home for therapy…He fell once and was then bedridden..The problem wasn`t the fall as much as it was the irresponsibility of staff not caring to do their jobs and monitor his intake and output of fluids..My dad became severely dehydrated and had a stroke as a result…When I got to him in the E.R.,he was close to death..This was back in Feb..he went into renal failure and is now lying in a bed needing hemodialysis and a ventilator…My sister and I are going to let him go this coming weekend…it hurts deeply,but he cannot lie in a bed as his poor body breaks down even further causing him much pain…
If anyone reads this,may I ask you to please send positive energy to us on Sat.5/22/10,when he is removed from life support? I thank you so very much ahead of time….With respect and love,Susan
Susan, I was touched by your story and can not imagine the pain you must be feeling at the coming weekend. Every life is precious, but know that you are doing the right thing for your father. I will be sending you positive energy on Saturday 22 May as will the universe with light and love. As you move forward, may I suggest that you honour all your feelings (both good and bad) and let them all be OK. I am sure your Creator has his arm around both you and your sister at this time, and your tears are his own. Wishing you courage, strength and love, Jenny.
Hi Susan,
Release any anger that you and your family have around the situation and know that healing is not always a cure. Know that your dad has recieved the healing and allow him to go in peace. He can return to the universal oneness. It is as he chooses. So be in peace and gratitude for all your time together, for all that you have experienced and all that you have learned from each other. Love and Light – Mag
Susan,
My heart goes out to you and your sister. I had to let my mom go on May 22nd, exactly a year ago. Though it was under different circumstances, (she was gradually failing and went naturally with hospice help), it was extremely difficult to say the least. I know, however, that though her body and personality are gone forever, her true Self lives on, in freedom from pain and suffering. It’s hard, but try not to let the anger at the staff destroy your peace of mind. Everything happens as it has to, though it may be beyond our understanding at the time. I’m sending positive energy to you and your sister. You’re doing the right thing to set him free. Love & peace, Judy.
I read about your father. I am Bhuddist. The chant that I do is Nam Myoho Renge Kyo (pronounced Nam Meeo-ho Ren-gay Kee-o ) . It is important to say it correctly. This chant will give both you , your sister and your dad positive energy to your life forces…..if your pappa can speak, it would be a good thing to have him repeat it after you so that his life force can be one with the positive vibration of the universe when he returns to it (the universe). We are all part of the universe, and will return to it one day…It’s been a hard time for you and your sister to witness your beloved pappa like this….It’s a drain on everyone….that’s why it’s important to lift up your life forces. True, sorrow must have it’s day, and that’s what you are going thru now – and at the same time you can lift your life forces – you are going to need that lift when all is said and done…..and also after you dear pappa is laid to rest, you and your sister can continue to send him positive energy by chanting Nam Myoho Renge Kyo, because he is only resting….Please send me a mail to let me know what you think – I’d like to share more with you. I will send you all positive energy 5/22/10. What time will you remove him? You can also send me an sms – 0731 84 1937.
Hi Susan,
I don’t usually come and read blogs… but I was attracted to it this time and read your letter. I believe everyone that reads your letter was attracted and will send you positive energy just as I did. I want to thank you for letting me release and let go. God bless you, your sister and Father. Robert M (L.A.)
Pete,
The problem I have in buying anything these days is that there are so many self help type of programs out there. 1 program that I have bought from you, that I am very happy with is Chunyi Lins Spring Forest Quigong.
I am interested I other programs the you offer,but I can’t afford to throw $200 at something that may just be hype ! respectfully ! Bob
Hi Bob,
Good point. Just know: All of our courses come with a 30-day satisfaction guarantee. At any time during that 30-day period you can email or call us to extend the guarantee to six months. This will give you more than enough time to see that our program are not just hype. And if you are not satisfied with your experience, you can always return the course for a refund of the purchase price. On top of that you can always call one of our staff success coach for free guidance and visit our online discussion forum–we want to support you in anyway we can.
Yes, we make bold claims, and with every single one of them I can look you in your eyes and say that we mean it. That it is possible for you to achieve the same.
Pete
This article is so beneficial, to those who are soooo looking forward to the goal and become upset when expectations aren’t met, and they vent in a negative way. This article makes you stop and look around at the things i have, or how far ive come, and the blessings, no matter how small, i have amassed. Being Grateful, brings us back to the now,back to focusing rationality. And with that breaks the pain dealing with negativity of some things we wanted but was not ready to have. Grateful.
This is wonderful, thank you! I am practicing as much as I can. I am excited about potential results.
Again thank you!
Great post. This “small thinking” or what Seth Godin calls the “lizard brain” is totally concerned with survival and it is a difficult thing to master. I certainly have often found myself hoping for one thing while my actions are totally directed on another. With practice it has gotten better, but I still default to it when I get stressed.